#Never gonna give you up

Jan 4:Day 4 - wandered around Salmon arm with my FBF and my sisters.

Conversations with the best friend:

Jan 5:Day 5 - Came home. Ate half of a Pizza Hut pizza. Probably the reason I felt sick for the next 24 hours. #soberjanuary #sogross














"We're just on different wavelengths..."
"RIAAHHH!"
"He made rape jokes all night...it was weird.."
"Really? That is weird."
"Ya. Even after I told him it's like my biggest fear, ever."
"Obviously he doesn't have experience hanging out with girls."
"He says he does. Like he's had girlfriends before and stuff."
"Well....were they normal girls, or girls who think rape is funny?"

That is the reason I love you the most. 

Jan 6:Day 6 - Went shopping with K Ruhls. Finally bought the grey Chucks I've been talking about forever! #soberjanuary #impulsebuyer

"Did you put water in the bucket?"
"No.....how do you do that?"


That is reason I am the only one who loves you the most..

Jan 7:Day 7 - first Saturday of the year. Saw Sheebs, worked, then went out for pub food and iced tea. #soberjanuary
















"Stop farting in my bed or I'm gonna come over there and cuddle you!!"
"Hey! It's my half of the bed!!"
"It's my whole bed!!"
"Well..you did it first!!"

That is the reason boys don't love us..

Jan 8:Day 8 - Lazy churchy and junkfoody day. #soberjanuary #iloveicecream

"I always had a crush on the black one. And kinda the red one."
"Hey! There's a green one too! He's the hottest!"
"Ew. No. He is gross."
"Hahah I think he's hot."
"I lied. I wanna sit on his beautiful face."

That is the reason we watch power rangers.

Jan 9:Day 9 - First day back at school means a night of homework and organization (because I was not a good enough student to do it before the semester started..) #soberjanuary #immabeanurse














"Then she blew him a kiss!"
"I would have been like: HEY! That's super rude! Stop loving your boyfriend! Don't you know I'm alone?!"

That is the reason we have no other friends.

#Growingup

 Jan 1:Day 1 - I was super hungover so I laid in bed and watched movies and drank fluids and ate cheese all day. #beginningofsoberjanuary









I decided to do sober January.

And I'm sticking to it. Because I am growing up and I need to stand by my decisions. And stuff.

See.....I've had a bit of a problem lately. In the alcohol area.

And by "problem" I mean I was getting slammed 3-4 times a week. Every week.

Which could not be a problem. It could be a party. Depending on how you look at it.

But considering I have probably destroyed my liver, and my savings fund, and my good girl somewhat reputable reputation, I think it was a problem.

And using my nursing critical thinking skills I came up with a solution.

Sober January - no alcohol for an entire month.

Jan 2:Day 2 - No longer hungover; went to town, ate Boston Pizza, went bowling, later ate ice cream, and cookie dough while watching the worst movie of all time. #soberjanuary













Best idea ever?

or worst idea ever?

I don't know.

I guess I'll find out.

I know I can do it, regardless of if it's a good idea or not.

Especially with the support I've been receiving from all of my amazing friends and family.

You just know it's bad when you were waking up with a hangover and regret more than twice a week.

You also know it's bad when you get drunk enough to tell some unknown guy that you were "the hottest bitch in this club" 

And when you go tell your friends you were dancing with a black guy.....only to find out he was blonde. With blue eyes. And pasty skin.

And when you call and text your exboyfriend 16 times just to tell him you're "over him"

This has become my life.

Also, I would like to point out this is not a new year's resolution. It is not sober 2012, it is sober January. 

And besides, my liver needs a rest before the extreme bender known as FBF's birthday - in February.

I have nothing more to say about this subject that breaks my heart.

My name it Mariah,  and I am not addicted to alcohol. However, I feel like a recovering addict rereading this post. Hm. We'll see. 

Jan 3:Day 3 - Laid in bed and watched movies including the best movie of all time - The Outsiders. Went to town, got our skates sharpened, ate sushi, came home and packed to go home. Then blogged. #staygoldponyboy #soberjanuary

#Todaytodaytoday

I haven't seen my best friend since the 23rd of December.

This is the best friend who has sleepovers every night. And the one I immediately tell everything to. And the one who pretty much knows everything about me. And the one who has accidentally seen my boobs. And vice versa. To all of the above.

It has been six sleeps since we slept together. [Like in the same bed, you pervert!]

That is too many sleeps.

So I'm gonna love on her face forever and ever and ever. And I'm never going to let her go!!

Also, I know Christmas isn't about presents, but I got a unicorn. Seriously. Apparently she is named "Rainbow" but I'm renaming her "Sunshine" because I know rainbows are magical, but she doesn't need a magical name to be magical. She does that all on her own. BUT she is the light of my life, I think. Hence, Sunshine.

Also, also, I can't wait to start my new year off with my TWO best friends! FBF and Ray Charles. Sounds like a party, right? Right.

Also, also, also, I have a crush. On a boy. Which is never really news, because I am always crushing on a boy. And like most other times it will probably start getting to where I want it to go and freak out and run. But just in case anyone was wondering the status of my relationshipness - single, infatuated, excited, nervous, frustrated. But mostly excited. And giggly.

Also, also, also, also, I think I am gonna do challenge 365 this new year. [1 picture every day for a year. Check my top 25 before 25 bitches!] With my pretty unicorn camera. And I think I'm gonna document it on here. You're welcome in advance for looking at my year in pictures.

Also, also, also, also, also, I miss my nursies, two of which [M,O] are off galavanting the world, and one of which [K, or K Ruhls] is working too much for my liking. Plus she has a boyfriend, and those are time consuming, I hear.

Also, also, also, also, also, also, I hope you are as sick of reading the word 'also' as I am of typing it. I don't care. I'm not done talking.

Also, also, also, also, also, also, also, I actually wrote this post last night [which is actually today, right at this very moment as I am typing] when I was putting off laundry. I will never grow up.

Also, also, also, also, also, also, also, also, I haven't showered in a while so I am pretty gross right now.

Also, I have been blogging for almost a year. Yikes!

xo. See you in the new year biznatches.

#Sometimes we puke on cowboys and eat brownies.

There's this girl. Who is my best friend.

She sleeps with me pretty much every night. Literally. We have sleep overs every night. And I cuddle her face off. She is literally the only person I can cuddle with.

We're together more than a married couple.

I've known her since I was suuuuuuuper young, because she lived next door to me.

We've been through years of good things and bad things.

She was at the hospital the day my Daddy passed away. And spent the rest of the day with me. And she drank my feelings away with me the night of his funeral.

She's the first one I confess my mistakes to.

She never judges me. Actually, she usually just laughs at me.

Sometimes we say things we don't mean. Sometimes I call her dumb. Sometimes she calls me a willy bum bum. Sometimes she says "don't flash me! You don't have a bra on!!" Sometimes I say "You're not allowed to fart in my car!!" Sometimes we say "You're not my friend!!" then we say "Yes I is!! I'm you're only friend!!"

Sometimes things happen and we get mad or annoyed. But we usually forgive each other before we can even voice that we're upset.

We eat chips and salsa and cheese. And ice cream. And beef dip with cheese. And pizza. And wings. And french onion soup. And calamari. And chicken fingers.

One time her lame boyfriend cried because we were spending too much time together. But luckily for me this girl has a backbone and doesn't bend to her boyfriend's every whim like most girls. So she told him to blow her and we spent the rest of the day together.

We used to walk to 7-11 every day together.

Now we drive to dairy queen every day together.

We used to play at the park across the street.

Now we lay in bed and watch movies together.

We used to have sleepovers every night.

Now we......have sleepovers every night.

Sometimes people ask if we're bi-curious. But we're not. We are literally just the same person.

This is my best friend. My FBF. My non-chines sister.

Don't mess with her or I will squish your head!!

PS you are gonna love your christmas present FBF. trust me. you will.

#I love my life

You know it was a good weekend when you come out with quotes like these:

"Skinny doesn't always mean healthy. Obese never means healthy, but lucky for you, you're not either!"

"Grab the metaphorical bull by the horns, and grab the mechanical bull by the rope."

"I refuse to eat tiramisu until your mom makes me some."

"Why is that guy's light flashing?"

"Because he wants to change lanes...."

"I don't think I'm ready to drive."

"You can literally overcomplicate boiling water!"

"I only know two things for sure: 1 - Denny's is the cure to all of life's problems and 2 - never trust a girl with a nipple ring."

"The Lions winning the Grey Cup is like Ben getting herpes. We all know it's going to happen so nobody really cares when it does."

"For American Thanksgiving I'm thankful I'm not American."

"Skinny blonde bitches....the worst kind of bitches."

"I like your moustache. And when I said 'like' I really meant 'am grossed out by'."

"I'mma bust outta this hospital and wreck a ho...or take a nap. Busting out seems like a lot of work."

"I love when flexidave teaches us useful things like how to properly ride a bull."

"I love to love Dong Lover's dong."

"I just wanna cuddle your face off, then put it back on cause I love it so much!"

"Stop looking at my elbows. Pervert."

"I officially have $3.14 to last me until payday."

"Know what you should buy with it? Pi."

"Sometimes I just grab my pecks and wish they were boobs."

Dear all of my friends,

Please don't ever leave me. And thank you for making it so easy to be the happy, bubbly person I am!

Love, Rye. xo

#It's like the sister wife version of 'Night at the Roxbury'

The weirdest thing happened tonight.

I was at an open mic night with my sister wife, my FBF, my Garden of Eden, and........the prettiest hippy in all the land [tag to come] when this guy comes around the corner with his computer.

I've been to a few open mic nights in my time, and never have I ever seen someone pull out their mac before. (I wonder what his computer's name is..)

Because this was a DJ. At our open mic night. DJing. Kinda.

He defs just played some of his mixes that he had been working on....and walked off the stage while they were playing (I mean seriously?! At least fake it like you're doing it on the spot!!)

ANYWHAYYYYY!

What do you think I did??

Shimmey'ed obviously. And rolled the dice. Pulled out my special ed. dance moves. And then it happened.

Right there. I did it in broad daylight. 

With my sister wife joining in.

It. Happened.

We did hip hop abs.

We tilted. We tucked. We tightened.

We made Shaun T. proud.

Yep. That is my life.

Stay Tuned - Saturday night is the sequel to our hip hop abs adventure.

PS that is exactly what we look like when we do hip hop abs. You should be ultra super jealous.

#It's a little bit funny...

....this feeling inside.

So I have this thing where I'm super not romantic. 

I cringe at PDA, gag at love letters, and roll my eyes at romantic songs. Ask me to sit through 2 and a half hours of a romance movie and I will laugh in your face. Then fall asleep.

I just don't see the appeal.

And yet I attract romantic guys like world of warcraft attracts fat kids.

Guys who want to write me love songs, and sing them on stage, send me love letters with sappy words and update their Facebook status to tell me how they feel.

Dear God.

The thing is, most girls would love that. Most girls would absolutely be lost in the affection and love being poured down on them. But I don't like it. It's all just a little too fake to me.

To me, love isn't about showing the world how much you love that one person. It's about showing that person. And not through superficial things like words and songs.

To me, people who feel the need to tell everyone every second of every day how in love with each other they are, aren't really in love. They just want you to think they're in love. People who feel the need to grope each other in public aren't happy, they're insecure. It's like you're trying to convince the world that you're happier than you really are. And worse, the people who bombard you with sweet words ALL THE TIME are probably trying to convince YOU that they like you more than they really do.

Think about it. You wouldn't tell someone you just met "Hi. I'm a nice person."and you definitely wouldn't tell them in every day conversation like "These socks are really warm. I'm a nice person." No. You would show them you're a nice person by being a nice person. And they can come to the conclusion themselves. Unless you aren't a nice person. Then you would have to find another way to convince them that you're a nice person. So why would you feel the need to constantly reassure someone that you like them, if you could just show them?

To me, romance is knowing someone's coffee order off by heart. It's being able to tease each other and not get mad. It's silly. It's about knowing what makes that person tick, what reaction they'll have in a situation, and how to calm them down. It's wanting to tell them everything about your day. It's being goofy together. It's acceptance. It's knowing the good and the bad that goes with someone and loving them because they aren't perfect, not in spite of their flaws. It's a decision. It's knowing that person loves you without being told. It's familiarity. The spontaneity mixed in with the routine. It's knowing someone for who they really are. 

It's the everyday love.

So the next time you want to post a public status telling the world how happy you are with your significant other, stop and think about why you're doing it. And maybe just show the one you're posting about how you really feel.

ps. I don't see anything wrong with a few status updates about the hubs. Just don't clog up my news feed with things that really do not need to be shared.

#Reflection in the mirror

Thanksgiving came and went like a whirlwind.

My long weekend is already over.

And I'm back to the day-in day-out of every week.

I had a lot of time to think about what I was thankful for this weekend. And in the midst of my anxiety, depression, and dark thoughts I was able to come up with an abundance of things I'm thankful for.

Here's a short list because I could go on and on in detail about why each of these things is important to me but that would bore you into never revisiting my blog..

- My little brother
- My ballerina sister
- My artistically inclined sister
- My amazing mother
- My strong Daddy (RIP) - and the opportunity to know what it means to have a Daddy
- The relationship that my whole family has with each other
- The rest of my extended family
- My awesome friends
- Mostly my FBF who is pretty much my third sister..
- My God, my Jesus - and the freedom to express my love for my God
- The house that I call home
- The food I know I can eat
- The clothes that I wear
- The education I am privileged to indulge in
- And all the little extras...I could be here for hours.

We live in a sweet little corner of the world. I don't need one day to be thankful for all of those things. But it's a good habit to get into to look at your life and know how well off you are. Because despite the "crap" we have to go through, we have so much more than 97% of the world.

#When the sun shines, we shine together

Because we were the chubby girls playing at the park;

Because we paced the path to 7-11 every day;

Because we put garbage in mailboxes;

Because we could go years without talking and pick up like nothing happened;

Because we ran away from bears;

Because we can poop at each other's houses;

Because you hold my hair when I puke;

Because you make me smile no matter what;

Because you held my hand through the hardest of times;

Because you make me ugly face laugh on an every day basis;

Because you are there for me to ugly face cry to;

Because I can just make ugly faces and you still love me;

Because you're the first person I come to when I screw up;

Because you laugh at my screw-ups and respond with a casual "sh!t happens."

Because we watch disney movies, usually 4 times before we both stay awake through the whole thing;

Because you are my very best friend;

Because of all that -

I will not judge you.

I will love you.

I will support you.

I will stand by you.

I might say things you don't want to hear.

But know it's because I care about you.

I want the best for you.

I look at you and see someone so beautiful, smart, funny and worth it.

And I just want you to know that no matter where you are, who you're with, what time of day it is -

 You will always have someone who loves you and thinks the world of you.

#Bruised Knees, Broken Toes

Today I dropped my flippen laptop on my toe.

And now it is a broken toe.

But not for realzies, it's just super bleedy and cutted and stuff..

And I've been yelling and whining about it for about an hour and a half or something.

So now I'm just going to drink some yummy tea with my FBF.

Then watch some footbaaaalllllllllll!!!!!!!

Then spend the rest of my day with 14 year old boys.

Then watch Bridesmaids and eat popcorn with my FBF.

Cause I love my FBF, she's my best friendddddddddd!!!

I'm also a little bit delusional from losing so much blood.

Now I'm going to go drink my yummers tea. Be jealous.

#Love.Is.Found.Everywhere.

Pretty much sums it up.

#She's That Kind Of Beautiful

Did you know that you're beautiful?

You. Yeah, you! Look in a mirror. You're beautiful.

Believe it. Because you are.

And don't let anybody tell you otherwise.

Don't let people get you down.

Only listen to the ones who build you up.

I don't care what he said or she said or they said or your dog said.

I don't care if you're having a fat day, if you're skin is breaking out, if you're hair won't do what you want it to.

I know that you have your own special qualities, talents, endowments, and attributes that make you who you are. That make you beautiful.

So I don't care what anybody else, including you, says.

You.

Are.

Beautiful.



#Fat Best Friends

I have a best friend. We'll call her FBF.

I have known this woman pretty much my whole life, we have gone through so much together, nothing could ever pull us apart. 

When she's happy, I'm happy. When she's hurting, I'm hurting. Not just for her, but with her.

Through the years we have grown together, we went from beanie babies to boys, from "the park" to parties, from slushies to ..... slushies with alcohol in them. We put garbage in mailboxes, run from bears, eat peanut butter and pickle sandwiches, and puke on cowboys together.

So, FBF, when I say you deserve the best I mean it from the bottom of my heart. I have known you for too long not to see how sweet, and caring, and funny, and absolutely beautiful you are. You deserve the guy who will hold the door open for you not slam it in your face, who will make you laugh not cry, who will wipe away your tears not cause them, and who will love you for everything you are not put you down for being you. You deserve more than everything, because you matter. 

You are one of the most amazing girls I know, you have pulled through for me when I didn't think I had anyone else. You make me laugh, you make me happy, you make my heart so full of friendship and love.

Don't ever change, I will always be here for you, and you will have your happily ever after with the most amazing and perfect prince charming.  Don't give up hope pretty girl, he's out there, and he's waiting for you.