Why do we always get SO close to what we want, only to have it all taken away from us? Why did I end up spending most of this day in tears when it should have been a celebration of life? Why do I once again feel like my world is crashing down around me to the point that I physically can't breathe? I can't handle any more. I just can't.
God, why are you pushing us like this?? Why can't You just let it happen? Why can't things just go smoothly, and be right? Why would You give us hope just to strip it from us again? What else is there?? Why, God, why why why!!!
And when I cry these words to Him, I feel an overwhelming sense of peace taking place in my heart. God is in control. I need to stop questioning it and just put my faith wholeheartedly into Him. I'm not supposed to understand. That's where the trust and faith in Him comes in. Father, I need you right now. I need You to take this from my heart. Because even with You here...
You have more courage than you know...persevere in spite of the fear. Faith is built in times such as these. I love you. <3
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